Know Who You Are Part 2

There is nothing like confidence, not cockiness, in self. When you are without a doubt about what you stand for and believe in there is nothing that can stop you.

Some of us figure this out at young ages, while others take years to find themselves. The latter are sometimes the ones that look for characteristics in others that they like and they adapt to their personalities, building some what of a clone in self. But all the while they still have not tapped into the one God created them to be.

When I was young some of that was me. Even though I knew what I believed in, and stuck to that, I didn't really know myself. I too tried to clone the perfect person in me that I thought others would like.

But as I grew up and matured, I came to a hard realization that no matter how perfect you try to be or are, all people are not going to like you regardless! So I figured then, that if your not going to like me, you won't like me for being the real me....not a clone.

It took me years to see who I was. How do I laugh, how do I feel, what type of people do I want to be around, what do I want to wear, what do I look good in, how do I handle stress, etc.. These were some of the things I had to take note of about myself. It was almost like learning to live all over again.

I remember right before my 30th birthday, I did some "house cleaning" in my life. I realized that because I didn't really know who I was, I had people in my life that really weren't for me. They were about what I could do for them, but was never there for me.

So my life played like a movie screen. And everyone that I saw that was not conducive for Christyl was eliminated. It was just that simple. I know that sounds rough, but that is the best thing I could have done for me.

That was the start of me seeing who I was by removing all the smoke screens and seeing clearly. Some of them didn't notice because.....they were all about themselves...hmm. My circle from then up until now has been very small. And I like it that way.

I am very loving to all people, but I know why each person is in my life (and that's with God's leading). I no longer drown out my seasonal relationships because I don't want to let go. Instead I thank God for the time I did have with them and make sure whatever I was supposed to pour into that person or learn, I did.

I thank God for his wisdom and discernment that has grown in me through out the years, to protect me from all the hazards of not knowing who I was. I am happy with who I am in Him and love being me!

Receive What You Expect

We all have our expectancies, whether good or bad. Sometimes they change depending on what we've been through. But regardless, we get what we expect.

There is a song called "Expect the Great" by Jonathan Nelson, that I love. It is uplifting and gets you in a mind to expect greater of what's to come than what you are experiencing now. I know we all get side tracked by the negative things in our lives and sometimes want to give up, but the word tells us that everything works together for our good.

When you begin to feel like your life is not getting any better and you start only expecting the worst, that's where it would be easy for you to lose the battle. No matter what, keep your focus that you are the head and not the tail and that God has not forgot about you. He wants you to live blessed!

Your latter (future) will be greater than your past and present. Once you change your views and mind set on life, then you will begin to see everything line up with your expectancy. Because regardless of negativity or positivity, your life is a reflection of what you believe.

If you believe you are better than your current situation, then that strength God has put in you will start to rise you above what you're going through. You will no longer settle for less or the mundane. You will see yourself with better and start striving for that.

So let's change our views to start expecting only the best for ourselves and our families and watch the power God has given you, turn your life around for greatness.

Who Wants to Change? Part 2

I've been working with a client (a music ministry) lately for the last few months. And to put it plainly.....there have been unnecessary challenges.

When I first meet with a client I make sure, in that first initial consultation, that they are ready for change and are open minded to accept new ideas that could get them to the next level. In this particular case the client said he was ready and seemed excited.

I listen to their goals and views on the dream music ministry for them. I assess the rehearsals and services to see what needs to be changed in order to help them reach those goals. Then I have another consultation with them to let them know what I see and what needs to be changed.

Now in the beginning I did say he seemed excited. But some people being told or shown what they are doing wrong effects their ability to want to move forward. They start holding on tighter to what has not been working because it's comfortable and familiar......kind of like their safe place for them.

Even when you come from love in telling them what needs to be changed, they take it as you being critical. They don't want to hear that what they have been doing all these years are not working. But apparently, something inside of them already knows if they have asked for my help.

As a consultant, sometimes it is my job to help them realize the reality of the current situation and be accountable for it. Once that has been accomplished then it makes it easier to move forward.

Working with this client has been like kicking a stone wall with bare feet. I know that seems drastic but it is the absolute truth! They, in the beginning made the (what I like to call) "face lift changes" like wardrobe, pitch and diction. But that is only like putting a band aid on a wound after having heart surgery.

So, I've come to the realization that this person, as the leader, is not ready for change or the next level. They want the image of success without the work. Unfortunately this person does not realize that they have mega ministry dreams with a store front mentality.

In order for them to move ahead they will need to be accountable and ready for God to do a mind change in order to fulfill the vision of their pastor and move forward with the rest of the ministry. But as for me.....it's time to move on to the next ready client until they are truly ready for change.